Mission: Network

There is no plan. I think about something Joe related that I want to write about, I write it. Sometimes I will review, sometimes they will be current releases... most often vintage stuff. Sometimes I will indulge in nostalgia or issues that plague me. But this is my message in a bottle. I want to hear from you, your stories. Comment! Or mail me: stephen.jubber@gmail.com

Sunday, 27 February 2011

SHARC


 The SHARC. Submersible High-Speed Attack and Reconnaissance Craft. Joe media from commercials to comics to cartoon all maintain it's a flying submarine. As the story goes, apparently at Hasbro's play testing centre, kids ignored the fact that it was an underwater vehicle and just swooped it around the room like an aircraft, hence it now is a flying submarine. 

Okay, I think that whole paragraph was me paraphrasing Thomas Wheeler. And this isn't a review. This is a discussion. Read his review at MasterCollector or whatever.

Bottom line is that, fun as it maybe to have this craft 'fly' out of the water and into the air, I ignore it in my Joe-verse. Why? Plausibility. And perhaps I'm expecting too much from a plastic toy but I'm an adult and need to justify things to my adult mind. Firstly, it has no wingspan. It's handling characteristics will flat-out suck. And what will it do when airborne? According to the box blurb, it swoops down on Cobra ships and strafes them with its twin, double 30mm cannons.


  Now I can appreciate the barrel diameter of these weapons as being 30mm, but the barrel length leaves much to be desired. I'm no ballistics expert but wouldn't those short, stumpy barrels make accurate shooting impossible? I also find it absurd that these weapons are within the engine nacelles. How is there space for ammunition and the engines? Finally, how can the pilot, Deep-Six, maneuver this craft though the air while he lying on his stomach? Most G.I. Joe media decided to omit that fact, opting for a more conventional cockpit seat. The toy simply has a flat bed, and while there is room for a standard sculpt Joe figure to sit on his arse, the unposable, blocky, brick of a figure called Deep-Six can only lie down.
 
Do you know what though? I absolutely looooove this vehicle.

In the post I recently received the 25th Anniversary re-release of this vehicle and it is a gem. A classic with some added shine but no new faddy touches that suck. It's so rare Hasbro manage that, and so much of the 25th Anniversary was very good, missed the mark ever so slightly. The SHARC (or SHARC TOOTH, thanks to trademark law) is a beaut, and I could want nothing more from it. The crispness of the white colour and crystal clear canopy give the craft a stunning aesthetic. The sculpt is intricate and very detailed, very few surfaces are smooth and without detailing. Vintage Joe vehicles had a fine tradition of removable panels and that is very present on the SHARC. A panel can be popped off to reveal an excellently detailed engine beneath.

  The decals in some instances go some way to explain these details by labeling them 'Tool Case', 'Aidkit', 'Cylinder Access' or 'Intake'. But of course this is nothing new and one of the reasons we love G.I. Joe toys, right? But the nifty nu-skool touch takes these decals to a whole new level. Tiny actual text offering detailed instructions have taken the place of printed lines of 'pretend writing'. I need a magnifying glass to read it, but I geek out every time. Nice touch, full marks Hasbro.


Praise also for the packaging - a window box with a diorama backing, situating the SHARC on the deck of the USS Flagg, with a Dragonfly and Skystriker in the background. I only wish that were a sign that those great toys were being re-released. But I'm pretty stoked with this SHARC for now. The only regret I have with the window box presentation is the the vehicle comes pre-assembled and has a few of its decals pre-applied. The joy with the vintage vehicles for me was getting the 'blind' package, putting it together myself and applying the decals. Having some factory worker do it for you robs me of that joy. And of course sometimes decals are applied a little less than perfectly and that bugs me.  

Something should also be said about the included figure, DEEP-SIX. The original possessed only two points of articulation - right and left shoulders. This update is only a marginal improvement with shoulder swivels, elbow and wrist cuts. You can pop off his glass dome helmet and his head swivels on a ball joint. No leg articulation, which follows the original. Fanboys bitch about the articulation. I don't mind it to be honest. He's normally in the cockpit in any case. And this body construction allows for his fun fun fun feature! Included with the figure is DEEP-SIX' bellows. It's basically a pump and a hose that attach to his back. Squeeze the pump and air will be pushed into DEEP-SIX body and he will bob to the surface. Release the pump and DEEP-SIX will take on water and sink. Fun huh?


 Well it would be, but the hose is coiled and very rigid and supports DEEP-SIX' weight too much, stopping him from sinking. But despite this, the figure is cool. Very clean, very clearly a faithful re-do of the original with some nice touches. My favourite? Tiny maneuvering thrusters on his back and heels and a clear 'light' on his shoulder (okay it's just clear plastic and doesn't light up, but I love it the all the same). 


In closing, I have to discuss the SHARC's role... it's an attack and reconnaissance craft. I'd say given DEEP-SIX' dive suit and... name, he does some deep dive work, perhaps recovery work, though I wish then that the SHARC had a manipulator claw of some kind. For its attack role, it packs two torpedoes that look like they could kill a Hammerhead or Bugg. Perhaps deployed in greater numbers it could give the Cobra submersible fleet a run for its money, but make sure you stick with the SHARC, the Joes' second entry in the mini-sub catagory, the Barracuda, is just too horrid for words.  

1 comment:

  1. I said I ignored the flying ability of the SHARC. I lied. It is so much fun to suspend my disbelief and fly this little sucker around.

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